1. Only in SOUTH
AFRICA..... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in SOUTH AFRICA.....are there handicapped parking places in front
of a skating rink.
3. Only in SOUTH AFRICA......do
drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to
get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the
4. Only in SOUTH AFRICA.....do people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in SOUTH AFRICA......do banks leave both doors open and then chain
the pens to the counters.
6. Only in SOUTH AFRICA.....do we leave cars worth thousands of RANDS
in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in SOUTH AFRICA.....do we use answering machines to screen calls
and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't
want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in SOUTH AFRICA....do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns
in packages of eight.
9. Only in SOUTH AFRICA......do we use the word 'politics' to describe
the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
10. Only in SOUTH AFRICA......do they have drive-up ATM machines with
Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?
Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid
made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why
don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?
Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?