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   Weekly Joke
2 January 2007

The Boere Computer Dictionary From South Africa

  • Monitor - Keeping an eye on the braai
  • Download - Get the firewood off the bakkie
  • Hard drive - Trip back home without any cold beer
  • Keyboard - Where you hang the bakkie and bike keys
  • Window - What you shut when it's cold
  • Screen - What you shut in the mosquito season
  • Byte - What mosquitoes do
  • Bit - What mosquitoes did
  • Mega Byte - What mosquitoes at the lake do
  • Chip - A bar snack
  • Micro Chip - What's left in the bag after you have eaten the chips
  • Modem - What you did to the lawns
  • Dot Matrix - Oom Jan Matrix's wife
  • Laptop - Where the cat sleeps
  • Software - Plastic knives and forks you get at KFC
  • Hardware - Real stainless steel knives and forks from Checkers
  • Mouse - What eats the grain in the shed
  • Mainframe - What holds the shed up
  • Web - What spiders make
  • Web Site - The shed (or under the verandah)
  • Cursor - The old bloke what swears a lot
  • Search Engine - What you do when the bakkie won't go
  • Yahoo - What you say when the bakkie does go
  • Upgrade - A steep hill
  • Server - The person at the pub what brings out the lunch
  • Mail Server - The bloke at the pub what brings out the lunch
  • User - The neighbour what keeps borrowing things
  • Network - When you have to repair your fishing net
  • Internet - Complicated fish net repair method
  • Netscape - When fish maneuvers out of reach of net
  • Online - When you get the laundry hung out
  • Off Line - When the pegs don't hold the washing up



Thanks Sammy & Andrew

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